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Female Libido Facts - Female Sex Drive Information - Female Sexual Energy Medications And Products
Female Libido - Female Sexual Energy - Female Sex Drive
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Female Libido - Female Sex Drive - Facts And Information

As it is difficult to test or classify the degree to which woman feels sexual stimulation, or to define the exact nature of a female orgasm, men get into considerable difficulties when they try to analyze her capacity for sexual excitability and orgasm. If they make any attempt to come to conclusions on the subject, they are forced to rely to a large extent on the information women volunteer them. And since women have no respect for exact scientific data and are interested only in what is of immediate benefit to them, they will say what seems to be convenient or opportune at the time. Consequently, any facts acquired on the subject of a woman's reactions -- whether, for instance, she is frigid, to what degree she can enjoy sexual intercourse, or whether her own orgasm can be compared to that of a man -- tend to be extremely contradictory (it is supposed that even Masters and Johnson did not get an average woman onto their test bed). As a result, man vacillates between the conviction that woman has no true sexual drive and the fear that she is more highly sexed than he is -- but refrains from telling him so out of pity. He will spend days working out bigger, better, and subtler questionnaires in his efforts to come to some conclusion. And, in the interests of science, he expects women to answer his questions truthfully. As if she could -- or would.
"It is probable that the truth lies somewhere between the two extremes. Certainly women are not all nymphomaniacs or there would be more male prostitutes [being a whore woman understand; getting a whore they don't.]. On the other hand, women do not feel an intense aversion to sex, as has so often been maintained.

Women live an animal existence. They like eating, drinking, sleeping -- even sex, providing there is nothing to do and no real effort is required of them. Unlike a man, a woman will rarely make an effort to get her partner into bed. If, however, he is already there, and she hasn't planned to set her hair or undertake some other form of large-scale beauty repair, and there is no TV program she wants to see, she will not be averse to making love, provided he is prepared to be the active partner. But even the euphemisms `active' for the male partner and `passive' for the female do not conceal the fact that woman allows man to serve her in bed just as he does in every other sphere of her life. Even though intercourse may give a man pleasure in the long run, it is nothing more than a service to a woman, in which the man is the better lover, arousing desire more skillfully, quickly, and making it last longer.

Men suspect that women tend to exploit them during intercourse and have developed a certain fear of female sexual appetite. Signs of this appear in the rites of ancient cultures, in philosophical works of men such as Schopenhauer and Nietzsche, in the novels of Balzac or Montherlant, in plays by Strindberg, O'Neill, Tennessee Williams. Since the discovery of oral contraceptives, this fear has reached almost hysterical proportions. Whole books are devoted to the question whether a man needs to worry about woman's sexual demands, and, if so, to what extent -- and at the same time, advertising has discovered new opportunities to make money by selling men advice on how to achieve sexual dexterity.

In truth, reliable oral contraceptives (invented by a man, naturally [because fear of pregnancy was always a credible excuse for not having sex] ) have robbed man of the only triumph left to him in his state of sexual subjugation. Previously, woman was always to a certain extent at his mercy. Now she is suddenly in control. She can have as many children as she wishes. She can even select the father (if possible rich). If she has no intention of having children, she can indulge in intercourse as often as it appears advantageous to her.

Man cannot do that. He had always claimed that his sexual potency was without limit and that he only needed an unreserved woman to prove it. Today this is impossible. . .and, thanks to efficient birth-control methods, she can experiment with different kinds of men and compare their sexual performances. Contrary to men's fear, women do not, however, weigh one man against another and choose the most virile -- far from it, as she herself is not all that keen on sex. In view of that, and provided all other conditions are equal, she is likely to prefer the less potent man because she can always blackmail him with her intimate knowledge of his weakness.

In the realm of sex, more than any other, man is a victim...

"All this serves to make man once again the victim of his habit of thinking of women in terms of his own standards. He really believes that women, now safe from the dangers of conception, are thinking about nothing but how to make up for lost time, to spend the rest of their lives making love. This is a natural assumption, since he has been manipulated to think that sex is the height of all pleasure. He is, of course, quite mistaken. A woman will certainly feel happy when she has an orgasm -- but it is not the most intense pleasure she knows.

There is only one aspect of a man's sexual potency that concerns a woman -- whether he is capable of fathering children or not. Children. . .are essential to a woman if she is to bring her plans to fruition. It is probable that many women would be pleased if man's need for sex dried up after she had produced two or three children. It would do away with numerous small inconveniences.

That sexual competence in a man is a matter of indifference to the majority of females is shown by the number of highly paid men who marry, and stay married, despite the fact that they are impotent (it is inconceivable that a woman without a vagina would have any expectation whatever of marriage to a normally sexed man)."  


Discomfort during sex
In the years following the menopause the body produces much less of the female hormone (oestrogen). The lack of oestrogen tends to alter the tissues in and around the vagina. You may find that the vagina feels smaller and tighter. Less lubrication is produced from glands around the vagina. As a result of both these changes, it may be uncomfortable or even painful when you have sex. Ways this can be helped include:

Lubricants. You can buy KY Jelly or similar lubricants from pharmacies. These help if you apply to the vagina before sex.
Hormone creams which contain oestrogen. There are a various creams and pessaries which may be prescribed by your doctor. These are usually prescribed for courses which last a few months. They replace the oestrogen in the vaginal tissues which often eases the problem.
Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT). This is more general hormone treatment that some women take after the menopause. After several months of use the tissues around the vagina often return to a state similar to before the menopause. However, long-term use of HRT is not generally advised unless symptoms are troublesome and the above treatments have not helped.


Reduced sex drive (Libido)
Many women say that they just don't feel like sex as often as they used to. A few women don't want to have sex at all. This may cause friction with your partner. Appetite for sex does reduce over the years, but may be made worse by depression or other problems of the menopause. These include: hot flushes, dry vagina, psychological problems, family problems, etc.

These are often temporary and being able to talk things through with an understanding partner is often all that is required. However, if symptoms of the menopause or of depression persist then it may be best to discuss this with a doctor. Both can usually be treated.   


Lack Of Sex Drive - Lack Of Libido
Lack of sex drive (lack of libido) is extremely common in women – but quite rare in men. Even men with erectile dysfunction (ED) usually have a perfectly normal sex drive.


How common is lack of sex drive in women?
Extremely common. The American Medical Association has estimated that several million US women suffer from what US doctors prefer to call 'female sexual arousal disorder' or 'FSAD'.

However, recent US claims that ‘45 per cent of women have FSAD’ are clearly absurd. At the moment there is a sort of ‘FSAD bandwagon’ – driven by doctors who think that nearly half the female population is lacking in desire. This really doesn’t seem very likely!

However, in the UK, family planning clinics and Relate clinics do see quite large numbers of women who complain of lack of desire.

Our estimate is that at any one time, several hundred thousand women in Britain are troubled by lack of libido. It's important to stress that many of these women have no problems with having orgasms. However, they have no real desire to have sex, and their minds are not turned on by the prospect of lovemaking.

Fortunately, for many women, lack of libido is only a temporary phenomenon. Some will get over it by themselves - and a lot more can be helped by expert medical or psychosexual advice.  


What are the causes of lack of libido in women?
As is the case with men, lack of desire in women can be of either physical or psychological origin.

Physical causes

anaemia - which is very common in women, because of iron loss during their periods (and in childbirth).

alcoholism.
drug abuse.
generalised disorders, such as diabetes.
post-baby coolness (PBC): this is the term we have coined for the extremely common loss of libido that occurs after childbirth. It is almost certainly linked to the violent changes in hormones that occur at this time, though oddly enough, no clear-cut changes in hormones have ever been identified. The general trauma of childbirth also plays a part - and after having a baby, many women are simply too exhausted to think about sex!
prescribed drugs, particularly tranquillisers.
hyperprolactinaemia - a rare disorder in which the pituitary gland is overactive.  
You may be surprised that we haven't mentioned the menopause as a physical cause of loss of desire. In fact - contrary to myth - it doesn't usually cause loss of libido, and many women feel a lot sexier (and have more orgasms) in the postmenopausal part of their life.

Psychological causes

These causes are very common. It's entirely understandable that when a woman is having a bad time emotionally, she may lose interest in sex.

depression  
stress and overwork
anxiety
hang-ups from childhood
past sexual abuse or rape
latent lesbianism
serious relationship problems with the husband/partner
difficult living conditions - eg sharing a home with parents or parents-in-law.  

What do I do if I'm a woman who is suffering from lack of desire?
It's sensible to begin by going to your GP who can discuss the problem with you and do any necessary tests.

But a very good alternative is to go to a woman doctor at a family planning clinic, since these practitioners deal with this particular problem every day of the week and are used to sorting it out.


Are there any magic remedies for loss of desire?
Not at the moment – though at the present time, it’s clear that the big pharmaceutical companies are desperately searching for a drug that will turn women on!. So you need to sort out - with the aid of an expert if necessary - what's causing your loss of libido, and then take the appropriate action.

Far more important than any 'magic' remedy is to have the support and understanding of a partner who wants to help you defeat the problem.

Hormones are often suggested as a miracle remedy for 'FSAD' - particularly the male sex hormone testosterone. Alas, doctors have been trying out this hormone on women for over 30 years - rarely with much benefit. Side effects include hairiness, spots, a deep voice, and enlargement of the clitoris.

However, it seems likely that very soon now – perhaps later in 2005 – a large drug company will start marketing a testosterone skin patch which is supposed to boost women’s libido. The launch is bound to be accompanied by massive publicity. But please take your doctor’s advice before deciding that this is the method for you.

Inventions that are supposed to increase female desire do come and go ... In 2001, a device called the EROS was approved by the American Food and Drug Administration (FDA) for treating FSAD. . It is a gadget that applies suction to the clitoris and is thus supposed to augment desire. Cost is around £200.

In fact, the EROS has made relatively little impact in Britain during the period 2001-2005, and our opinion is that you could achieve much the same effect with any relatively inexpensive ‘suction-vibrator'.

A much hyped new 'desire cream' was also introduced in 2001. It contains an ingredient similar to wintergreen, and its effect is to produce a tingly sensation in the clitoris. It too has made surprisingly little impact on British medical practice.

Drugs like sildenafil (Viagra) have still (2005) not been shown to help women with lack of desire, though there is some evidence that they may have a beneficial 'local' effect in increasing blood flow to the vagina and clitoris for a few hours. They may also increase lubrication in some women. But in Britain, these drugs are not licensed for use in females.  


Loss of desire is common in women (but rare in men).
It can be put right, but you need to look carefully at the causes of the problem – preferably with the loving cooperation of your partner. There aren’t usually any ‘quick fixes'.  
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